she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Randomize
