you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Randomize
