So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Randomize
