I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
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He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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