You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
My vagina just clenched in fear
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