Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Randomize
