I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize