My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
