I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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