adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
