i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
You are the jesus of drinking
My Sexting was not on an AP level
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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