Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
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