i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
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I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
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Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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