He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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