We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
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