the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Fuck appropriateness.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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