I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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