She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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