I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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