I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
