While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
