i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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