"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
we're making bets on your personal life
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Randomize