So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Randomize
