Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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