OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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