have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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