Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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