that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
birth control should be required to get into college
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
