the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Farmville is her only friend.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
