Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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