omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
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