Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
