Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
My balls are so social today.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Randomize
