I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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