Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
