If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
