You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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