I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
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