Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
