If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
