Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
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