you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
