My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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