oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
this will be a night to untag.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize
