were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
