would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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