where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
