Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
