I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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